Well, the end of my first semester at a real school is coming to a close. Next week is finals and then- Meggy is done until late Januaryish. And to think- I have only given ONE update. One update in the beginning of the semester about how I was lonely. And I didn't even go into detail. But boy, how things have changed in the past three months! Basically... MEGGY SCORED!
Yeah, you read right. Sweet little innocent Meggy here got herself a man! A sweet, cute, just-as-innocent-as-herself man that holds her hand and buys her slurpees. Now you must be wondering: How. How the hell did I get a boyfriend? Well kick back and relax for my longest entry ever as I share with you, "The Inspirational Story of Meggy's First Love."
It all happened on Tuesday, September 28, 2010, at 5:34PM. I had gotten out of class and, as I was a minute away from the light rail station, my train left. I was upset. Very upset. But missing light rail trains is the story of my life. Nothing new. I sat down and waited.
I was shuffling through songs on my iPod when it happened. In my peripheral vision, a man took a seat right next to me. Automatically, I look up. The first thing I saw was beautiful, straight, long brown hair. But alack! I could not see what this man's face looked like for he had gotten out his Android phone and was bent over it- his long locks obscuring his face from view. I wanted to see this man's face. To see if his face was anywhere near as beautiful as his hair. A car screeched in a distance. He looked towards the source of the sound. That's when I saw his face. Beautiful, olive green eyes. A nose that turned upwards. Small jawline. He was a cute one... A cute one that immediately went back to playing on his phone. That God damn phone. He should be looking at me! He should be trying to start a conversation with me! I should be starting a conversation with him… But I could think of anything to say without sounding creepy and/or stupid. Plus he probably didn't want to be bothered. He was clearly occupied. So I sat there, gazing at his beautiful hair while he sat there, gazing at his beautiful phone.
After a good ten minutes, the train came. We both got on it. He took a seat by the window. All other seats were taken. I could have easily gone up to him. Ask him if I could sit down next to him. Maybe a conversation will spark! Alas… I could not. I was too scared. Too nervous. When would I even see this attractive male specimen again? Why waste my time and his? He was clearly occupied with his phone. Nothing would happen anyways. Nothing would ever happen…
I spent the rest of the night hating myself. It was bad enough that I couldn't think of anything to say to this man, but the fact that I couldn't even ask him one simple question? Just a simple, "Can I sit here?" That's all I had to do. Nothing to it. But I couldn't do it. All I could do was stand there, holding onto a rail while gazing upon his beauty. What a gutless loser I was!
On Thursday, I saw him again.
We had both barely made the train. There was an abundance of free seats. I took a seat near him. He got out his phone and began playing on it as I listened to my iPod while gazing upon his beauty. "Push Me To The Floor" by the Parlotones started playing on my iPod. And that's when it happened- I swooned. I felt myself swooning over this boy- repeatedly. I never swoon over boys I've only seen twice in my life. I might check them out. I might inconspicuously stare at them. I might think, "Day-um! That is one sexy mo fo!" But I never swoon over a complete stranger. This man was an exception…
When I got off the train, I knew I had to find out his name. I HAD to. I would not sleep in peace at night until I knew what this man's name was! But how? How could I approach such a gorgeous creature and ask him such a personal question that I had no business asking? Then it struck me- The phone.
The phone was the key- the key to unlock the boy's mouth. He was obsessed with that phone. In love with it. Always distracted by it. I had even christened him "Phone Guy." What better way to strike up a conversation than to question this phone he was so passionate about? So I spent the weekend planning…
On Tuesday, I would make sure to be at the light rail station around the same time as Phone Guy. I would be sure to sit near him. When he starts playing on his little phone, I would ask him about it. What features does it have? What kind of plan is it? Tell him I'm looking to buy a new phone. See where the conversation goes from there. Definitely introduce myself and find out his name.
Tuesday came. I sat at the station and waited for Phone Guy to show up. Waited anxiously. Nervously. Hoping beyond hope everything would go according to plan. I'd be happy, thrilled, excited, just to know what this man's name was! After what seemed like hours, he walked up to the platform- TALKING ON HIS PHONE! What blasphemy is this? He's supposed to be PLAYING on his phone- not TALKING on it! How was I to talk to him when he was talking to someone else?! It was ruined. My wondrous plan was ruined! I spent all weekend anticipating this moment only to have it destroyed by the person on the other line of the phone!
Luckily, when the train pulled up, Phone Guy hung up and got on. I followed. Alas, he had immediately put his phone away. How could I ask about his phone if it wasn't in view? There weren't any available seats, so we both stood. Next to each other. In silence. The train hadn't moved yet. I was desperate- desperate for this man's name! So I said it. "Why isn't this train moving?" He mumbled something about train times. After a painful silence, the train started moving. I had to keep a conversation moving. He always had a backpack on him. So I asked him if he went to my school. He said he did. Then I asked him what he was majoring in. He mumbled something about trying to get into the Advertising major. He asked about me. I told him about how I was in Graphic Design. Then the moment came. The perfect moment to find out his name! I introduced myself, "I'm Megan by the way. What's your name?" "Paul." Paul! His name was Paul! I finally knew his name and could sleep at night knowing the name of the man I was dreaming about! I asked him one final question: "Is this your first semester here?" Indeed, it was! Was he a transfer student? No! He was not! This boy was fresh out of high school! 18! 18 years old! I was a 21 year old woman lusting after an 18 year old boy! What a COUGAR I am! I decided I had asked enough. I decided that, if he cared enough, he would start asking me questions. But alack! He clearly did not care. We stood there in silence, for the rest of the ride. But I was in bliss! I knew his name. I knew his name- and now I could go back to admiring from the shadows, knowing that I had at least tried…
I shared this tale with a few friends. One of them asked me what I was going to say to him next time. Say to him?! I have already said enough to him! He didn't seem exhilarated about talking to me. I probably weirded him out. I probably annoyed him. I had done enough. I'd talk to him again when he'd make the choice to talk to me. What right do I have to even talk to him in the first place? How could I possibly start talking to him regularly without being a creeper?! Fortunately, my new friend came up with the most ingenious plan! It was nearing the time of year where it was getting darker sooner. Taking lightrail home so late? That's not safe. That's not safe at all! I could use a man. A kind, sweet, attractive man to save me from all the weirdos that light rail entails. A man to rescue this damsel in distress from the dangers nighttime brings us! I would ask him to be my "VTA Buddy." To be a friend who will take the train home with me. Who will wait with me at the station. Yes. That plan will solve all my problems! Problem was- Did I have the guts to do it?
The next time I saw him, I mustered up every ounce of courage I had. I went up to him. I opened my mouth and… I started babbling like an idiot. I started babbling on about how I see him at the station frequently. I started babbling on about how it's getting dark out. I started babbling on about the dangers of taking light rail alone at night. Somewhere amid all this babble my mouth produced, I asked him if he would take the train home with me regularly. We could just meet at the station at a certain time. He just stared at me throughout my babbling- which made me babble even more. Finally, when I finished sounding stupid, he said he couldn't make any promises. That he barely makes this train. That he might miss it occasionally. But he said he'd try. And that was enough for me. Then we started talking. Just small talk. But talking! A major improvement from our previous encounter.
Everything went on smoothly from there. We were friends. Friends! I was happy with that. Very happy. But could we be something more? Probably not! Until the next time we met up to take the train together…
I had gotten out of class quite early. So I sat and waited for Paul to show up. In a few minutes, he did! He was early. Freakishly early. But… why? "My last class was canceled." His last class was canceled… His last class was canceled… That could only mean one thing: This boy waited around campus for well over an hour just to take a ten minute train ride home with me! He didn't HAVE to do that. He really didn't. But he did. I felt flattered. Flattered that such a man like him would wait oh-so-long for a girl like me. Could he possibly have feelings for me? Eh, probably not.
But...
The next time we took light rail home together, Paul stood near the handicap seats while I sat in a handicap seat, looking up at him as he'd talk. We were discussing bacon when, out of the blue, a girl standing nearby asks, "Are you two together?" Confused, we both asked, "What?" She said, "You know… Are you two dating?" Paul and I looked at each other stupidly. I was waiting- waiting for him to say the dreaded, "No, we're just friends." I didn't want to do it. I didn't want him to think that friendship was all I wanted. But alack! I did not wish to appear desperate. I did not want to freak Paul out anymore than I already have! The same thoughts must have been going through Paul's mind as well. For all he could do was stare at the doors, blushing. The girl asked us again. Pestered us about it. Finally, to shut her up, Paul light-heartedly said, "I dunno… Are we?" I told him the truth… "I wouldn't mind dating you…" He just continued staring at the doors, blushing, as the girl started encouraging Paul to ask me out. So embarrassing. So awkward. But Paul's silence to that question must mean he likes me to some extent, right? Oh what am I saying?! Of course he doesn't! Stop deluding yourself, Megan!
We did make plans to hang out after school on Wednesday. So when Wednesday came around, we took light rail down to Oakridge mall. There, we just ate and went into a couple stores. Nothing majorly exciting happened. Then again, what majorly exciting things could have happened anyway? It's not like we were DATING or anything. As we ran out of things to do, my mother called announce that she was on her way to the mall to pick me up. So we both walked out to the parking lot where my mother awaited. Before we said our goodbyes, he made some sort of weird motion towards me. Like, he was going to hug me… But he didn't. Nor did I. We just stood there looking at each other for a few seconds, until he smiled and said, "I had a nice time." I concurred, and suggested we hang out again sometime. Then, he did something I never thought he'd do- He suggested we exchange phone numbers. Phone numbers! How wonderfully awesome was this?! He must like me! Somewhat…
Nevertheless, things were still going strong. We'd see each other on campus regularly, I was starting to meet him outside his class instead of at the station, we hung out once more, started giving each other hugs goodbye. He became my second closest friend. I kept trying to convince myself that yes, this boy likes me. He has to! And so I concocted an elaborate plan…
I would tell him "I'm tiiirrreeed…" and rest my head on his shoulder for a few seconds. See his reaction. Break a touching boundary. Just something small and innocent. And so I waited...
We were sitting at the station. Daylights Savings had just occurred so naturally, it was dark. Really, really dark. The perfect time for me to pull my move had come! So I did it. I said, "Ugh, I'm tiiirred…" and the second my head moved towards his shoulder, he wrapped his arm around me and held me to his chest! Oh sweet bliss! He kept me there. Invited me to sleep there. I didn't expect anything like this to happen. Nothing had prepared me for this. But I was content. I remained that way until the train came. I could not second guess it anymore- He likes me! That gorgeous creature whom I was too scared to talk to likes me!
The next day, we hung out. We went miniature golfing- but nothing worth noting happened there. Nothing compared to what had happened afterwards...
We did not know what to do after Golfland. So we found ourselves at Almaden Lake Park. There, I concocted another elaborate plan… Get him to hold my hand! Alas, Paul's hand was in his pocket! How could I brush up my hand against his if his was hiding in his pocket? Dash it all! Dash it all to hell! After a good five or ten minutes of walking, he finally removed his hand. I nonchalantly brushed my hand against his. He got the hint. He knew what I was doing. He was more clever than I thought! He held my hand, and I couldn't have been happier!
After playing on a playground like immature children, we resumed walking. We stumbled upon a trail. A trail that leads to the top of a small hill. We chose to scope it out. As we trekked to the top, we found nothing. Nothing but a few large boulders. We sat down on them, and he put his arm around me once more. Put it around me like he did at the light rail station the previous night! Once more, I was content. Happy. Delighted. It was then when I had to ask him the truth. I had to know. It was most likely true, but it had to be confirmed. So I said, "Not to make this awkward or anything but… Are we dating?" He responded, "Seeing what we're doing right now, I'd say 'yeah.'" Yes! Megan has scored herself a man! Her first man ever! After 21 years! 21 long, lonely years! I was happier than I was when I was done with math forever! Happier than when I got to ditch school to go to Disneyland! Happier than when my brother moved out of the house for good! (Okay, I wasn't THAT happy, but I was pretty close!) We were silent once more. I never wanted to get up. But I had to- for we both kept sliding off the rocks and there was nowhere else to cuddle. But alas- It was getting late anyway. We had to depart. But as he dropped me off at my house, and I gave him a hug, he unexpectedly kissed me on the cheek! I was taken by surprise, but I returned the favor.
Things had slightly changed. We spent free time cuddling in a secluded area I had found at school. On Wednesday, he ditched a class and we went to a nearby park- where we spent a few hours together. Where he looked into my eyes in a way no one else ever had. I had to be dreaming. No way could any of this be real… But it was.
That Friday, we hung out once more. He picked me up and drove me down to his hometown to show me some of the parks he frequently visits.
At the second park he showed me, he led me down to a secluded area by the creek, under a bridge. The scenery was beautiful. There was nothing to lean up against however, so we laid down on the ground. My head on his chest. His arm around me. After awhile of me listening to his beating heart, I kissed his cheek. Then he turn his head towards mine, and… we kissed. Four times in a row. After that, we held each other. I informed him that that was my first kiss. He informed me that it was his first kiss as well. Amazing… It might have taken me 21 years to do it, but this man was well worth the wait! And now we have our own little "special" place.
That was almost a month ago. Things only got better from there...
So THAT is how I got a boyfriend. I almost didn't get him either. I was too scared to talk to him- but I sucked it up and did it and now he is mine. I'll never have to wonder "what could have been." May you learn from what could have been the biggest mistake of my life... | 